Effective Ways to Transition from Co-Sleeping
Many families discover co-sleeping early on, sometimes because their baby sleeps better close by, or simply out of a need for more rest during tough nights. Over time, this sleeping arrangement can shape the routines and relationships of everyone in the home, leading to changes like moving cribs or making space for new siblings.
Parents often consider if and when it’s the right time for their child to have their own sleeping space. Whether motivated by growing families, changing sleep needs, or the hope for uninterrupted rest, the transition away from co-sleeping is a common experience. Practical strategies can help make this change smoother for both kids and parents, supporting healthy sleep habits as children grow.
Helping Your Baby Sleep Alone (0–18 Months)
Parents can move a baby from co-sleeping to their own crib by following steady routines and a clear plan. Young babies adjust best when nap times and bedtimes happen in the same safe spot, like a bassinet or crib.
Experts suggest that parents keep their own bed off-limits, even for short cuddles, especially during the first few months after the switch. This helps prevent any confusion for the child about when and where sleep should happen.
Parents should create a safe, cozy sleep environment. Babies need to sleep on a firm mattress with no loose bedding, bumpers, or stuffed toys nearby. A dark room works best, so blackout curtains help keep out sunlight and streetlights. Some parents use a noise machine to block out distracting sounds, creating a calming setting.
The bedtime routine helps a baby feel ready for sleep. A consistent series of calm, quiet activities lets babies know that bedtime is coming. This might include a warm bath, changing into pajamas, a gentle rocking session, and a simple lullaby. Keeping the routine the same every night builds security and trust.
Families can choose from different sleep training methods. For example, parents may stay in the room, sitting in a chair that moves further away each night, until the baby gets used to falling asleep alone. Some parents may choose methods that are quicker, while others prefer a slower pace. Patience and consistency help, since some babies may need several weeks before they can sleep independently.
Babies can sense their parents are nearby if parents place a familiar scent in the crib, like a worn T-shirt or a bedsheet pre-slept on by mom or dad. Parents should watch for signs of sleepiness to set naps and bedtime at the most restful time for their child. If needed, parents can consult with a sleep expert for extra support and a personalized plan.
Transitioning Toddlers (18 Months–4 Years)
Parents can help a child move from co-sleeping with patience and planning. They should talk openly with their child about the change before making it. Explaining that everyone can sleep better when they have their own space can help the child understand why a new routine matters. Giving the child a few days to get used to this idea can make the switch easier.
Parents can create excitement around having a “big kid” room. Involving the child in picking new bedding or decorating the room with favorite colors and themes helps. Letting the child help choose a stuffed animal or nightlight can build a sense of pride and comfort about their new bed.
Timing matters. If a new sibling is expected, parents should make the move at least three to six months before or after the baby comes home. This helps the older child not feel replaced or pushed aside. The goal is to make their room feel positive and important.
At bedtime, parents can keep routines calm and predictable. A regular routine with activities such as a bath, reading a book, and cuddling signals to the child that it is time for sleep. Parents should avoid rushing this time, as a relaxed bedtime makes kids feel safer and more secure during the night.
Many families find a gradual transition works better than sudden changes. Parents can sleep on a mattress next to the child’s bed for a few nights, then move the mattress further away until they are no longer needed in the room. If parents choose a quicker method, having a set plan for how to respond to night waking helps everyone know what to expect.
When children wake up and want to return to the parent’s bed, parents should stay consistent. For those in a crib, parents can offer gentle reassurance and leave the room, even if the child is upset. If the child is in a regular bed and can get up, parents can calmly lead them back to their bed and say goodnight again. Parents may need to repeat these steps several times each night at first.
Children may try very hard to go back to the old routine, especially when sick or upset. In these moments, parents can offer comfort by staying in the child’s room but should avoid letting the child return to the parents’ bed. Sticking to the plan, even during difficult nights, helps the child adjust and understand the boundaries.
Helping a Five-Year-Old Sleep Alone
When a child has co-slept with their parents for years, moving to their own bed can be challenging. Explaining to the child why sleeping in their own space is important often helps. Parents can talk about independence and reassure their child that family time and affection will still happen during the day. This type of discussion sets clear expectations and shows empathy for the child’s feelings.
Consistency is key for success. Parents should avoid letting their child back into the parental bed during the night, even if there are protests. Sometimes, children have not tried sleeping alone simply because no one has expected it of them before. Encouragement, patience, and maintaining boundaries let the child know that everyone believes they are capable of this change.
A regular bedtime routine with calming activities, familiar objects, and cuddles can help a child feel more secure in their own bed. Below is an example of a routine that supports independent sleep:
| Step | Activity | Purpose |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Put on pajamas | Signals bedtime is near |
| 2 | Brush teeth | Part of daily care |
| 3 | Read a story together | Comfort and connection |
| 4 | Cuddle or hug | Emotional reassurance |
| 5 | Turn on nightlight | Eases fear of the dark |
| 6 | Give child a favorite toy | Security and familiarity |
Some children find comfort in having a favorite toy or stuffed animal nearby. Parents can also use positive reinforcement—such as a special outing or small treat—to encourage progress. It helps to link the reward to the benefit of restful sleep by saying something like, “Now that we’re all rested, we have the energy to do something fun.”
If a child shows signs of anxiety about being alone, parents should talk through those worries and offer reassurance that they are close by. Addressing fears around bedtime can uncover deeper concerns that need attention. If anxiety persists or begins to affect other areas of the child’s life, it may be helpful to speak with a doctor.
